I’ve been having a rough week.

I’ve been in a pissing match with my best friend because I got fed up with letting her feel so incredibly alone, wallowing in self-pity, self-destruction, and self-righteousness.  It’s been painful.

I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep, and I’ve been really tired.  Am really tired.

I realized that the most overwhelming longing of my innermost self is to marry a good man and be a good wife, then have a child or children and be a good mom.

I have also realized that I don’t have ambition to do anything else.

I also have realized that I will never find a husband and most likely will never have children, and will inevitably die a virgin. 

I don’t want to go job hunting but I’m going to have to. 

I wish I could just book a flight to some random place and never tell anyone I’m going and never come back.

Maybe I should help mom start a real business just for kicks.  Maybe she’d pay my loans off or something.