I have been mentally writing this post all weekend, which hopefully is pretty self-explanatory. Here I will list out some of my worse habits and personality traits and what not, just for kicks.

1. I prefer to yawn loudly like a lion. In fact I usually pretend I am a lion when I yawn.
2. The only thing that I regret about shenanigans I perform when I drink is that I have never once blacked out. I am cursed to remember every embarrassing moment. If you see me randomly cringing for no reason I am just remembering something I wish I hadn’t done. Or at least hadn’t remembered.
3. I smoke cigarettes. I know. Gross. It’s a revolting affectation but it soothes me.
4. I tend to judge people by whether or not they understand 30 Rock’s humor.
5. I have a deep love for all carbohydrates. I could eat carbohydrates for… ever.
6. If I don’t like someone I will be so angry when they do something nice for me. Once I got super pissed off because I was hungry and a girl I didn’t like gave me half of her sandwich. I was offended because not only did I not like the girl but I also hated the kind of sandwich she got. Even her choice in sandwich offended me! And then she had to offer it really nicely, which would have been rude to turn down, and I had to eat it and it was only moderately disgusting.
7. The worst fights I get it happen between myself and either my best friend or my mother. These fights are usually the stupidest things ever and at least 50% or more my fault.
8. I hardly ever clean out the shower drain.
9. Mornings are the worst and so even when I wake up fresh and focused I still buy myself breakfast most mornings.
10. I make really inappropriate jokes at inappropriate times. These times include funerals, church, public.
11. I am so nervous at job interviews that I can’t smile. Literally, I will never be seen looking anything less than anxious and uptight at a job interview.
12. If it’s on sale there is a 75% chance that I will buy it.